Earth to Rove...We're Losing Contact...Earth to Rove...
by Joshuah Bearman

So can we finally put the false image of Rove the Machiavellian genius to rest? How many times must it be said that the guy lost the election that gave him his national reputation in 2000? Ever since, we've all been like scared villagers, wailing and tearing our hair about big bad Dracula and his supernatural powers up in the castle.

Well, last week we found out that Dracula is just a man, a regular old local tyrant, deluded and petty like any other. Last week, the guy was flashing a V for victory at reporters from Air Force One. Tuesday came, and the GOP lost 24 out of 33 Senate races. The Democrats held all 18 defending seats and gained six. Throw in the 202 seats Democrats defended in the House, and you have a 220-0 record. Include the 14 defending statehouses and that's a staggering 234-0.

That's right: no Democratic incumbent running for congress or governor lost. In my book, an 0-fer-220 pretty much knocks you out of the Hall of Fame.

Especially when Rove was so smugly wrong about it. As usual, virtual reality reigned at the White House last week, and even as the real numbers were coming in, Rove brooded in his office with his own "numbers," counting up tallies like non-existent Wehrmacht divisions. Even now, after the 32,100,000 voters chose Democratic Senators -- 7.5 million more than the GOP's 24,524,000 -- Rove thinks that the candidates who lost failed because they didn't follow his plan to the letter. Let's hope he's still around to forfeit in 2008, when the GOP will be defending 21 Senators to the Democrats' 12.